Mattress firmness guide: soft, medium or firm?
Hi, we’re John and Mimi. After size, firmness is the choice people worry about most, and the labels don’t help: one brand’s “medium” is another brand’s “firm.” Here’s how the firmness scale works, how to match it to the way you sleep and your body, and every mattress we sell grouped by feel at today’s prices: same factory models, lower price than other online retailers.
The short answer
- Side sleepers: medium soft to medium, so shoulders and hips can sink in a little.
- Back sleepers: medium to medium firm, so the hips stay level with the shoulders.
- Stomach sleepers: firm, so the lower back doesn’t sag into the bed.
- Combination sleepers or couples who disagree: medium or medium firm is the safest middle, or pick a flippable mattress or a split king so each side gets its own feel.
The mattress firmness scale
Most stores describe firmness on a rough 1 to 10 scale, where 1 is very soft and 10 is very firm. It isn’t an official standard, so treat any number as a ballpark. What matters is the feel each range gives you:
| Firmness | Rough scale | How it feels | Usually best for |
|---|---|---|---|
| Soft / plush | 2–3 | You sink in and feel hugged | Lighter side sleepers |
| Medium soft | 4–5 | Cushioned, with support underneath | Side sleepers, people with sore shoulders or hips |
| Medium | 5–6 | Balanced: some sink, some lift | Most adults, guest rooms, combination sleepers |
| Medium firm | 6–7 | Supportive, a little cushion on top | Back sleepers, heavier side sleepers, couples |
| Firm | 7–9 | You lie on top with very little sink | Stomach sleepers, heavier back sleepers |
How to choose your firmness
By sleeping position
The goal in every position is a fairly straight spine. On your side, the bed needs to let your shoulder and hip sink in, or your waist bends. On your back, it needs to keep your hips from dropping. On your stomach, it needs to stay level so your lower back doesn’t arch. That’s why the usual advice runs softer for side sleepers and firmer for stomach sleepers. More detail in our side sleeper guide and firm mattress guide for back and stomach sleepers.
By body weight
The same mattress feels firmer to a lighter person and softer to a heavier one, because more weight presses deeper into the comfort layers. A simple rule of thumb:
- Under about 130 lbs: go one step softer than the position advice above.
- About 130–230 lbs: follow the position advice as written.
- Over about 230 lbs: go one step firmer, or choose a hybrid with pocket coils for deeper support. See our guide for heavier sleepers.
Couples with different tastes
Medium to medium firm is the usual compromise. If one of you clearly wants soft and the other firm, a split king lets you choose two different Twin XL mattresses, or a flippable mattress lets you switch sides until you find the one you like.
Firmness isn’t the same as support
Firmness is how the top of the bed feels. Support is how well the core keeps your body level. A medium soft hybrid can be very supportive thanks to its coils, and a firm mattress can still have a soft quilted top. Thickness plays a part too: an 8" firm mattress feels firmer than a 12" one with the same label, because there’s less foam to sink into. Our mattress thickness guide explains why.
Tips before you buy
- Give a new mattress a few weeks. Foam usually softens slightly as it breaks in, and your body needs time to adjust after an old, sagging bed.
- On an adjustable base? Foam and hybrid mattresses of any firmness bend well. Raising the head or using zero gravity changes how firm a bed feels in different spots, so many people go a touch softer. See best mattress for an adjustable base.
- Sleep hot? Softer foam hugs more and can feel warmer; gel, copper and coils help. See gel memory foam vs hybrid.
- Every bed we sell ships brand new and factory-sealed, which is how we keep prices low.
Our mattresses by firmness, at today’s prices
Firmness labels below are the factory’s own descriptions for each model:
| Pick | Best for | Model code | Twin XL | Queen | King |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 12" Essentials Plush (soft) | Soft and simple, lighter side sleepers | 12ESS-TL |
$359 | $469 | $589 |
| 14" ActiveAlign Zoned Hybrid (medium soft) | Plush hybrid with pocket coils, heavier side sleepers | 14REACTIVE-TL |
$539 | $689 | $839 |
| 12" EcoCore Hybrid Deluxe (medium plush) | Gel memory foam over pocket coils | 12HSOY-TL |
$459 | $609 | $739 |
| 10" Rose (medium) | Best-value everyday bed for most adults | 10BNV-TL |
$339 | $429 | $479 |
| 12" Copper Gel (medium) | Our most popular copper memory foam | 12BNCOPPER-TL |
$409 | $529 | $609 |
| 12" ActiveAlign Copper Zoned (medium) | Softer under shoulders, firmer under hips | 12REACTIVE-TL |
$489 | $609 | $709 |
| 12" iSwitch Flippable (medium soft / medium firm) | Two feels in one mattress | 12ISWITCH-TL |
$449 | $569 | $689 |
| 10" EcoCore Hybrid Premium (medium firm) | Pocket-coil support, back sleepers | 10HSOY-TL |
$409 | $549 | $639 |
| 12" Ananda Pearl & Gel (medium firm) | Medium firm with edge support | 12PEARL-TL |
$389 | $489 | — |
| 12" Lavender Firm | Thick firm bed for stomach sleepers | — |
— | $509 | $559 |
| 8" Daisy Firm | Firm on a budget, kids and guest rooms | 8BNV-TL |
$309 | $389 | $429 |
Prices are today’s prices, read live from our catalog, with free FedEx shipping included.
12" iSwitch Flippable Two Sided Mattress - Medium Firm/Medium Soft - 12ISWITCH
Can’t decide between softer and firmer? This one has a medium soft side and a medium firm side. Sleep on one, and if it isn’t right, flip it over.
- Two sides: medium soft and medium firm
- Gel memory foam on both sides
- Takes the guesswork out of firmness
From $449 (Twin XL) · Queen $569 · See sizes & details
10" Rose - Medium Firmness - 10BNV
If you just want a safe middle that suits most adults and guest rooms, the 10" Rose is our best everyday value.
- Medium feel
- Bends well on an adjustable base
- Every size at today’s prices
From $329 (Twin) · Queen $429 · See sizes & details
Shop this guide
Softer for side sleepers, firmer for stomach sleepers, medium for most everyone in between.
- 12" ActiveAlign Reactive Copper Zoned Memory Foam Mattress - Medium, from $489. Zoned medium feel that suits side and back sleepers.
- 12" iSwitch Flippable Two Sided Mattress - Medium Firm/Medium Soft - 12ISWITCH, from $449. Two firmness levels in one mattress.
- 12" Lavender - Firm - 12BNF, from $509. Our thickest firm mattress for stomach and back sleepers.
Questions we hear a lot
What is the mattress firmness scale?
Most stores describe firmness on a rough 1 to 10 scale, where 1 is very soft and 10 is very firm. It is not an official standard, so one brand's medium can feel like another brand's firm. Soft is about 2 to 3, medium about 5 to 6, medium firm about 6 to 7 and firm about 7 to 9.
What firmness is best for side sleepers?
Usually medium soft to medium, so the shoulders and hips can sink in a little and the spine stays straight. Heavier side sleepers often do better on a medium or a hybrid with pocket coils.
Is medium firm good for most people?
Medium to medium firm suits the widest range of adults, especially back sleepers, combination sleepers and couples who need a compromise.
Does body weight change how firm a mattress feels?
Yes. Lighter people sink in less, so a mattress feels firmer to them; heavier people sink in more, so it feels softer. As a rough rule, go a step softer under about 130 lbs and a step firmer over about 230 lbs.
What if my partner and I like different firmness?
Choose a medium or medium firm compromise, a flippable mattress with a softer and a firmer side, or a split king with two different Twin XL mattresses. Questions? Text John at 805-617-6878.
Still deciding? Just ask us
Tell John how you sleep, roughly how much you and your partner weigh, and what you didn’t like about your last bed, and he will point you to the right feel. Text or call 805-617-6878, 6 AM to 9 PM Pacific, or take the 60-second mattress quiz. See our Purchase Policy & Warranty for the details.
Written by John & Mimi Venti, MimiJohn. General comfort guidance, not medical advice; prices update automatically.